The Shovel

Australia's second favourite source of satire, after Today Tonight.

Google Already Knows How You Will Waste This Afternoon

Google satireForget any plans you had for a productive day. Google already knows that you’ll spend the best part of the afternoon sifting through old emails, searching “cat falls off table” on YouTube and checking the cost of flights to Thailand.

According to a new algorithm developed by the world’s most popular search engine, you’re pathetic and lazy. Despite your very best intentions, you’ll start to waiver around 11:30am with a quick check of Facebook, pass off an extended browse through an online clothing store as ‘part of your lunch break’, before losing any remaining respect for your work commitments at around 3:46pm.

And as Adelaide accountant Jane Reuben realised last Friday, there’s no point trying to deny you’re a skiving waste of space. “Last Friday when I typed ‘latest accounting research papers’ into Google, it returned with ‘Did you mean photos of your ex-boyfriend?’ Uncanny.”

The Shovel is Australia’s satire news website? Follow The Shovel on Facebook and Twitter.

Advertisements

Post a comment ...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

Information

This entry was posted on June 28, 2013 by in Society and tagged , , , , .

Enter your email address to get the latest scoops shovelled to your inbox

Follow The Shovel on Twitter!

  • Looking for The Shovel? We've had our underscores surgically removed. We're now tweeting from @TheShovel See you there. 1 year ago
%d bloggers like this: