The Shovel

Australia's second favourite source of satire, after Today Tonight.

12 Dead, Scores Injured As Gay Couple Marry In California

gay marriage satireAmerica’s worst fears became reality today when a gay couple tied the knot in the Californian capital of Sacramento, killing at least twelve people.

It is believed the couple spontaneously exploded at the conclusion of their private ceremony, causing surrounding buildings to burst into flames.

The tragedy comes as the US Supreme Court deliberates over whether same-sex marriage should be allowed.

Billy Teague, who has been campaigning against gay marriage outside the court since Tuesday, said it was an accident waiting to happen. “This is what we’ve been saying would happen all along. This is a calamity. More people are going to die. This is just the start of it”.

And things could get much, much worse. Sources say God has got wind of the marriage and is on his way down to ‘sort things out’.

The Australian Liberal and Labor parties released a joint statement saying Australians had no need for concern.

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8 comments on “12 Dead, Scores Injured As Gay Couple Marry In California

  1. Tim Vollmer
    March 28, 2013

    “Labour” party? Really? Even satire needs a spell check!

    • The Shovel
      March 28, 2013

      Thanks Tim. Harold, our editor, has been asked to take the rest of the day off. He says, in his defence, the ALP looks like a lot of hard work at the moment.

    • pico
      March 28, 2013
      • The Shovel
        March 28, 2013

        It was originally “Labour”, changed to “Labor”.

  2. Erin Duffy
    March 28, 2013

    The only thing missing from the Labor party is “u” Tim.

    • Tim Vollmer
      March 28, 2013

      Love it. Of course the other thing missing from the Labor Party is voters…

  3. Deb Lowan
    May 14, 2013

    Woot! Love this piece.

  4. Isobel
    July 19, 2013

    Well…what a shock. Is this what happens when someone has a baby out of wedlock to? 😀

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This entry was posted on March 28, 2013 by in World and tagged , , .

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